The Literartist

Oh you little superficial stalker. Pity. Your home page refreshes and you see one of your friends has walled another, writing nothing but “inbox”. In protest you let out a nasal snigger of disapproval. You grudgingly think the only reason Jack wrote “inbox” on Jill’s wall was to let their notification starved audience know they are tastefully “inboxing.” How vain. Firstly, Jack, if you’re “inboxing” it’s meant to be private; so keep it private. We don’t care (why then are you sniggering?) that you two inbox each other all week. Jill isn’t mentally challenged to not know that she got an inbox from you, Jack, without you making it conspicuously obvious by obsessively writing “inbox” on her wall.

Ah, but walls are always two-sided. While you cannot penetrate through its brick, concrete, and internet, you cannot but also deny that you are unaware of what the flip side looks like. Come then, let us drill through it, because you my friend, don’t know Jack.

Context: The nature of the walled post also provides a context for the “inboxed” message. They can act as a post script or a prior warning. Bad news—grabs the bottle. Good news—still grabs the bottle (figurative example). Read it.

Encryption: The use of clandestine codes and gibberish understandable only to the sender and the receiver has also been an upward trend in the past two years of Facebook. They function as public rituals aimed at fostering personal appreciation of the group involved. Elves in Middle Earth use Elvish; Hermione uses Runes; and I sometimes, use, Pig Latin. Do it.

Commanding Focus: Imprinting “inbox” engenders in the recipient the need for focus, while the sender commands it. Hence, a power dynamic sprouts, forcing the communication to be more successful through means of force. Wield it.